I recently shared an experience I had – a series of events (and perhaps a little bit of hormones!) – that made me to believe that I’m a bad mom. I had a bad, BAD day. OK, perhaps I’m being a bit generous. I had a series of bad days.
I was fighting with all of our (4) children. Our 7-year old had been practising for their school concert for weeks, and it was the week of the performances. We were in bed late every evening. I knew she was tired. But the moaning…
Our 5-year old is our only son. A busy, loud, messy, boy. Need I say more? He has such a gentle heart, but oh, that boy is busy. And messy. And loud. My poor senses were overloaded!
Now the little threenager is a mommy’s girl. Her love-language is quality time. She does not like to go play by herself. She does not enjoy watching TV unless you’re sitting next to her. She also loves exploring mom’s make-up, mom’s shoes, mom’s earrings, mom’s paperwork, mom’s cupboards…and hiding them under her bed. So when you’re not giving her the attention she wants…the mischievousness comes out exponentially.
And little one had a couple bad nights with fever and teething.
I was done. Irritable. Fed-up. Not the good, fun, patient mom I normally am. And my kids felt it. After one such scolding, my three-year old came to me in tears and said I broke her heart. “Dis stukkend.”, she said between sobs.
Can you feel how my heart just sank and the mom-guilt rushed in like a tidal wave? Completely washed me over. “I am a bad mom.”, I said to myself. Over and over. “This moment right here, this is what my children will remember about what type of mom I am.”
But in the deepest, quietest part of my soul, I heard a Voice tell me something different. He said:
“You are a great mom. You are wonderfully made. You are blessed. Highly favoured. And worthy. And teaching your children to be great human beings.”
And with so many voices and sensory inputs, and hormones and things that seem to need my focus and attention, it was like God was oh-so-gently, but firmly reminding me that having a bad day does not make me a bad mom. I am not a failure.
So today, I want to to let you know that you are an incredible mom. No, I don’t know you. I don’t know how many times you’ve asked you child to “just go play…” I don’t know how many showers you’ve taken with tears rolling down your face because you are just so utterly exhausted. And I don’t know if others have told you and made you believe you’re not a good mom.
But I do know the One who made you. And He says you are not a failure. He says you are worth far more than rubies. He says you are loved. Precious. Strong. Highly favoured. A GOOD MOM.
Of all the moms in the whole wide world, in all the times from the beginning of the world, He chose you as the BEST option because He knew no one else would be a better fit for those children of yours. No one else would make a better mom to him than you. So take a moment. Breathe. Thank Him for creating you for such a time as this. Know that He’s got you. And that you are a good Mom.